Yesterday, God started to move in my heart about matters
concerning my mother. We were singing
the song “Mighty to Save,” and I finally understood in my heart that Christ has
been nailed to the cross for my mom because He loves her that much. He has already washed away all of her
stains. Therefore, I need to get rid of
my selfish hurt and start thinking about “the glory of the risen King.” He has already risen and conquered the
grave. He can do the equivalent mighty
work in my mother. For everyone needs
forgiveness and a kindness of a Savior. I
want to surrender my life and this situation to Jesus so I can show the love
that Christ has demonstrated towards me.
I want to love her deeply “because love cover over a multitude of sins.” 1 Pet 4:8. It was God’s love and others demonstrating His love towards me that led me to turn and surrender to Him. I want that more than anything else for my mother. I want God to be glorified and to put my hurt aside because my heart FINALLY feels the freedom to trust Jesus even though I may hurt deeply. I didn’t notice until about two weeks ago, but I felt too hurt to even be able to trust in Jesus in this situation. The outcome of this false belief in who God is was for me to hold back from loving on my mother as Christ loves her and keeping me in a state of anger with what our relationship has been throughout the years. The truth is that Jesus is my solid rock that I stand upon. He is my security and he will not let the righteous fall. Ps 55:22 I want “my hope [to be] built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.” I want to “not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus’ name.”
I want my mom to know truth just like others who have been here at OU have led me to see and know truth in my heart. I want Mom to know what Nancy Edwards told me…how precious she is to Jesus. He loves her with an everlasting love, so BASK IN THAT LOVE. (Jer 31:3).
I want her to know that she is God’s child; His beloved
daughter whom He bought with His own blood. I yearn for God to open her
eyes to see how He longs to be gracious to her, and how He rises up to show her
compassion. I want God to grant her His strength through quietness and
trust. To restore her the joy
of His salvation, and sustain her…letting her cast all her anxieties upon Him
because He care for her.
I want God to her with the knowledge of His will, through all spiritual wisdom
and understanding. I pray that in order that she might live a life worthy
of Him, bearing fruit in every good work, growing in her knowledge of Him,
being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that she
may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the One
who has qualified her to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom
of light.
